Happy Summer Solstice Everyone!
Summer Solstice is a time of quickening, bursting into action, like the seed that has been germinating underground for months (or longer).
I am very excited to share with you that after over a freakin’ year, I am now very clear on the course of my life (for at least the next year).The clarification process is something I entered very deeply- I journaled, meditated, prayed, researched, I wrote out in explicit detail what i wanted my life to look, feel, taste, and sound like. I worked with a shaman, an astrocartographer, and a channeler of Divine Grace. I worked with my dreams.
I studied with mentors who could help me expand my idea of what was possible–I took a Dream-walking class with Toko-pa, immersed myself in shamanic journeying with Sandra Ingerman, did a course on The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know is Possible and The Space Between Stories with Charles Eisenstein.
I worked with Animal and Plant Spirit Guides and cultivated my inner ear and intuition hawk gifted me with 2 feathers, just this week as a way of saying, “it’s time to spread your wings, soar and coast”.hawk gifted me with 2 feathers, just this week as a way of saying, “it’s time to spread your wings, soar and coast”. I explored or felt into moving to various cities. From all this I got much richness, but nothing tangible, or so I thought. In the mean time, every aspect of my life as I had known it was literally and metaphorically crumbling to dust; my health, my career, my social network, several friendships bit the dust, my finances, every electronic device I possessed, all my previous gains in making changes to diet and healthful practices- kaput. I just couldn’t seem to gain traction; everything I tried to manifest or effort I took disappeared into thin air or blew up in my face.
These have been some very, very dark and challenging times these past few years. Then recently, I revisited a dream– a longing that when I previously explored, had too many obstacles/barriers. But now that the rest of my life had disintegrated, there was nothing to dissuade me from making a bold move. And not just in the tangible ways; the complete unravelling of my life as I know it, has allowed me to release attachments and entrenched ideas of what life is supposed to look like….what success is supposed to look like and now I am…..free !
Are you ready for me to tell you what the big change is?!?!?
I am moving to the Sacred Valley in the Andes of Peru!
Some of you may remember that I went to Peru in 2013 on a healing retreat- Embody True Nature Consciuousness Transformation, and went as a medical participant through Paititi Institute. When I returned, I had lost 25 lbs. and had a complete remission of fibromyalgia for 6 months, improved blood-sugar balance. and a new found sense of inner peace and hopefulness and understanding. One of the things that struck me as very beautiful during that time was how happy I could be living very simply. I didn’t miss facebook, didn’t miss watching my favorite programs, didn’t miss electricity and could tolerate cold showers. I was very much in the moment and in deep communion with Pachamama. I was also very moved and inspired with the tireless and selfless service of the 2 founders, Roman Hanis and Cynthia Robinson and their dedication to preserving and healing the Earth, building intercultural bridges with the local peoples, fostering healing and transformation, using permaculture principles and more. They shared that they were in the process of finding land to steward, to build a permaculture based eco-village that would serve as a base for healing and consciousness retreats. My heart lept and I knew i wanted to be of service and help create something so wonderful and in alignment with my values. You can read more about the wonderful work they do here:
I really respect Paititi’s approach in helping to preserve not only important rainforests and land, but also the wisdom and culture of this region which is at risk of being lost forever, without wise and humble people willing to step forward to be guardians and work for its preservation.
So I am selling my car, 90% of my personal possessions and moving with my 2 animales. We will journey to the sacred valley and I’ll work with some local shamans for a month or 2 to help me acclimate to the high altitude and address my pain and fatigue and other health issues. Then when I am a bit stronger, I will journey to Paititi, which is over a 2 hr. hike in on very steep terrain. I have offered 1 year of service and have been accepted for a 1 month trial period, to see if it is a good mutual fit. If not, then I will live in a nearby town and find another way to volunteer. It seems to make no sense– i have trouble sleeping on my super plush memory foam mattress and taking my dog on short walks on flat terrain without pain and fatigue; what the hell am I thinking moving to some place where I probably will have trouble climbing up the mountain the 1st time, with all my possessions on my back, sleeping in a tent on the ground year round, and living in the most basic of ways.?!? I have so many specific nutritional needs, and yet here I may only eat purple potatoes for a month. I’m completely broke and too sick to work, yet I’m offering myself up for a year of intense physical labor and receive no pay. Of all my life explorations, this one seems the most far-fetched. And yet…..
And yet, I know, without a shadow of a doubt that this is exactly the thing I need to be doing, and exactly the thing the world needs from me now, and exactly the thing that will restore my health and vitality. I knew it from the moment I 1st saw pictures of the stunningly beautiful and sacred land.
I have spent the last 2 years trying not to drown in a mire of negativity and hopelessness at the tangle of health and personal challenges I’ve been in, and yet when I visualize myself living here, I see myself rising to the challenges that *will* come up, with grace, a positive attitude, joyfulness, wisdom, openness, willingness and humility. And those are parts of myself that are longing for expression. So all those things I thought was my life falling apart, were really just things that were ready to be released falling away. All the isolation I’ve experienced, was really a way for me to dive deep and find inner strength and companionship, and to have enough distance from the life I had been conditioned to lead to see things through organic and wild eyes.
But it’s not all about me and my personal transformation….to be healing and transforming myself while in service of something so much larger— well, there just isn’t anything better, in my book. And I know…just know, that this will be in service of healing the planet, the environment, others, the course of humanity and even our god-awful human history.
I’m feeling so grateful….so moved, so tender, and so relieved.
So radiating blessings your way for whatever transformation is taking place in your own life, big or small, or even yet invisible and asking for your blessings on this beautiful, and long-awaited turn in my life.
Much Love and Light,
BTW, I’ll be journeying at the end of August, so a few more months to savor your dearness here!